Friday, January 29, 2016

Time Flies When You're Having Fun...

Happy Friday world!!  I took a trip down memory lane yesterday by looking at some photo albums off my Facebook page.  Boy does time fly!  I was quickly saddened by all the changes that occurred in such a short amount of time, especially from 2011-2012.  I saw pictures of me and my ex, my other friend with her husband.  We all looked very happy together.  Obviously me and my ex broke up not long after and my friend and her husband are currently separated.  I found a group picture of a woman who passed away last year.  She is one year older than me.  The weird thing is we are still  going through the motions from those years.  You don't have enough time to adjust before something else happens.  It's the sad reality of life.  It DOES move fast, and sometimes staying afloat is all you can do.  I left work bummed out, only to receive a silly video text from someone currently on vacation.  He is truly living it up out there!  It made me feel warm inside knowing he's enjoying his time off.  Embrace it, I thought to myself.  You never know what's around the corner that can change your whole life.
Last week was a short work week due to Martin Luther King Jr.  I took down all of my Christmas decorations.  I am pretty satisfied with the my holiday décor and am looking forward to what retail shops will be offering up next winter.  It's a joyous season, but now that we're in January, my focus is mostly shifted to my resolutions:  what I would like to get out of the upcoming year.  Since I'm aware of the changes that have happened in my life in the past, I really want to manage my money better and build up my savings.  For what?  Who knows.  But at least I can get a head start with the financial aspect of it.
I did some damage control over the weekend.  I'm not proud of it either.  It is a reminder to me to not get too carried away for it to become a habit or else I'll really be in big trouble.  What started out as a simple dinner plan grew into a full blown night out on the town.  I wasn't prepared for staying out so late, especially since I already had plans the next night for a birthday party.  UGH!!!  Regardless, who can resist Union Sushi and some cocktails?  Yes I am guilty of such, but I DO want to tone down the nightlife scene.  We made our way to Concord Music Hall to check out Morgan Page and Borgeous only to end up at The Mid later on to catch the same show!  LMAO! 



 The Skinny Geisha Cocktail!



I'm not a fan of oysters, but I DO love how they garnish these at Union!


We ordered a lobster and had this dish FIRST! 


The lobster bisque came SECOND!  This was DELISH!!


Finishing up the last of the lobster via rolls...


HUGE turnout for Morgan Page and Borgeous...



These guys were a fun crowd...


I can't believe we went out after this show.  No pictures of The Mid because my phone died out.  We didn't stay long...



Thursday, January 28, 2016

One Year Already!!

The following week in January, things slowed down a bit.  I stayed in and the Golden Globes helped me get through Sunday.  I knew I had a one year old birthday party coming up the following weekend.  Not to mention, I was near the finish line to knock off my huge debt.  I wanted to stay on track with my budget.   I quickly finished up a short book I bought off ebay called "A Technique for Producing Ideas".  I like reading self-help and entrepreneurial books.  Sometimes you need an author to psyche you up!  Plus, I always feel the end results get your brain juices flowing with creativity.  If there's one thing I would take away from this book, is to "not make the mistake of holding your ideas" close to you. " Submit it to the criticism of the judicious."  Even if it's your passion, you NEED to express your ideals to other people and see what they think of them.  Don't take it as someone having the opportunity to be judgmental.  With a new set of eyes, they may see something you could have overlooked.  And if they do find something wrong, go back and fix it!  Trial and error are crucial in making ideas come to life. 
On the 15th my friend held her daughter's 1st birthday at Wonder Works Children's Museum in Oak Park.  I can't believe she had her little daughter one year ago this day!  It's unbelievable how time flies.  She is absolutely precious!!  It sometimes got a little chaotic with all the kids running around, so it helped that my friend rented out the whole place for her little girl.  I also got a chance to catch up with my other friends who became moms last year.  It's getting harder and harder for all of us to get together.  I told myself I will try my best to attend any celebrations I could so I could see how everyone's doing.  My social situation is changing now that they have all settled down.  Whether they know it or not, I still need them in my life but I am understanding how their lifestyles have changed. 
I was invited later on to catch a dj at Paris nightclub afterwards.  Me and my friend who lives downtown (and who is also about to have a baby herself) made our way towards the city.  We both stopped by the Hampton Social to catch up with another friend who was having dinner and drinks there.  We figured it will probably be the last time she could be out in general before she has her baby.  She only stayed out for 15 minutes, but at least she got her chance mingle.  I finished up there and made my way to Paris nightclub.  Luckily we didn't stay out that long.  I was exhausted since I did work that Friday.  It was pretty low key the rest of the weekend.  I thanked the frigid temperatures for that!  It helps make the decision to stay in worth it, plus be on top of your financial goals.
Wonder Work Children's Museum!

Check out that dessert table!
Add caption
This little one's birthday will be in May

The birthday girl herself!  She loves pizza!
She made a mess but she's happy!!





  

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Do what works for YOU!

During the first Saturday of the year, my friends wanted to catch up for a bit.  The holidays were officially over, and getting together seemed like the ideal thing to do.  The past 2 weeks were all about family.  I agreed to meet up because I always felt that your friends are your second family, (and sometimes they just "get" you).  Of course it fell apart quickly, and not everyone made it out as they promised to.  We originally met up at Old Town at Benchmark, a upscale sports bar.  College football was on tv and the crowd seemed pretty excited.  It's not my thing, but sometimes you have to go with the flow if you want to get out of the house. 
Once we realized our group was going to stay small, we made the most of it and caught up with one another.  At one point we decided to break up and head our own way.  I figured since I made the trip out in the first place, I would quickly checkout Y bar.   It's a pretty known fact that the weekend after the holidays it's dead EVERYWHERE from retail shops to the nightlife industry.  I saw some friends and then we all decided to head next door to Shay.  I was beat, but did make a promise to myself not to step out again unless we're celebrating something.  Going out for the sake of drinking and spending money is not on my list of things to do for 2016.
The following day was Sunday and the friends that did not make it out before wanted to hang out now.  I made my way over to Wicker Park for some Sunday Funday action, but again, the scene was dead.  I felt we kept "looking" for some action.  This did not appeal to me at all since I was on the verge of paying off my huge debt.  I realized I had to make a decision on what I was trying to accomplish for myself.  Unfortunately, I've reached the point where I'm bored of the scene and rather be at home drinking a glass of wine and reading my Italian work book.  It's all fun and games but when you have different financial goals than everyone else, you have to figure out what works for you.  Yes we did "catch up" but it seemed that we could have saved this for another time.  I knew right away that I wanted to do things differently this year. 
At the end of the day, you need to take care of yourself FIRST.  It may not be easy.  You can catch up with friends over the phone.  It's cheaper.  Me and my co-worker friends decided to follow up a savings plan to help us reach our goals for 2016.  I'm excited I have a little team going with this.  I think it will push us to strive as a group.
Unfortunately, not too many people out and about.  Check out the background!  lol
   
 

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

TREAT YOURSELF!!

Last year around this time, I treated myself to see Sam Smith in concert.  I knew he was coming in town, and got SUPER excited when I looked into tickets.  I bought a ticket right away before even asking anyone if they wanted to come with me.  Before you knew it, the show was sold out.  I figured I'll just go by myself.  I've never done anything like that before, and I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!  I decided at that moment that no matter what, I would treat myself once a month to do something that I wanted to do.  It was part of my New Year's Resolution for 2015.
The following month the movie 50 Shades of Grey came out, and me and my girlfriend went as each other's dates on Valentine's Day.  lol.  We were both going through a tough time.  My mom's husband was nearing the end of his terminal illness.  Despite our current situations, me and my girlfriend still wanted romance in our lives.  We had a good time and met up with some friends afterwards for drinks.  I checked off February's treat with a sexy movie.
My mom's husband passed away towards the end of February and then she went into a depression.  It was a hard time for all of us.  I completely forgot about myself and was consumed with my mom's well being.  Before you knew it, months passed by and it was nearing my birthday.  I was starting to feel hopeful again, and booked my trip to Paris and Italy without even thinking about it.  I knew I wanted to leave asap, but in the meantime, I still had to go through the summer before my big trip came up.  I took up softball at my firm's league, and then took some dance lessons afterwards to kill some time.  I spent last summer getting to know myself again. 
Coming back from my trip, I got carried away with birthday parties and mingling, but completely stopped my treats-to-myself.  Now that it's 2016, I want to continue my little tradition of taking myself out again.  I can't wait to line up some activities for the year!  I'm getting excited again just thinking about it...
After spending New Year's Eve in the suburbs, my dad wanted me and my brothers to come by again for dinner at his house.  It was Friday night again, and I couldn't agree more on spending it with family this time.  I'm worried about my dad and his finances.  He's 70 years old and still working 2 jobs.  He told us this is the year he will cut back on work but it breaks my heart he won't slow down.  He seems physically and mentally fine, but there has been troubles at home which makes me wonder if he's purposely overworking himself.  I've been so busy checking in on my mom that I forget to see how my dad is doing.  No matter how well you're doing, don't get too selfish to reach out to others.  Sometimes all they need is to have someone hear them out.  It makes a world of a difference plus you could offer them insight on their troubles. 
Happiness is seeing my family happy...
My Dad's wife made pozole!  A Mexican traditional dish used for special occasions.  It's perfect on a cold, January night!

The garnishes for pozole!
The hardest working man I know.  He just won't stop...

Monday, January 25, 2016

New Year's Eve!! New Year; New Me

I'm FINALLY recapping the end of 2015!!!  lol.  I'm glad I've reached this point so far.  The past 2 years of writing my thoughts down has led me to reveal a couple of things in my life.  It took me a while to feel comfortable discussing some issues since there's been so many changes with me within the past 5 years.  What's hard sometimes is right when you think you've weathered a storm, another one comes along and changes everything.  The hits keep coming.  I miss the days when everything seemed carefree.  Now I look back and wonder how I manage to survive all of this.  I know I haven't had it hard as others.  I know there could be far worse things in the world to deal with.  But we all know when you're going through tough times, you feel isolated and lonely because you feel you're the only one in the world going through this.
Well you're not.  I went through a bad breakup 3 years ago.  Not to mention, it didn't happen overnight.  It was a slow motion of unraveling revelations, about him, about me, about us.  Trying to discuss it with my friends seemed pointless.  Up to then, most of them haven't settled down with anyone yet.  They had no idea how much it hurt.  Of course they went through breakups in the past, but my ex boyfriend was "the one" to me.  He was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with.  What happened?  I was blindsided that we reached that point of no return.  It hurt a lot and it took some time for me to feel ok to move forward.  Mostly because I did not know what the plan was for me anymore.  It was always me and him, and now it's me trying to figure what I want to do next.
The first 2 years without him hurt a lot, but the following year, I started to feel comfortable within myself.  I was having a good time with my friends again, and we did a lot of things together that year.  Then Spring of 2014 happened, and my mom found out that her husband had a terminal illness.  The rest of the year was watching him deteriorate to basically nothing when he finally passed away in Feb 2015.  Death is a process, too, just like a breakup, but the effects are forever haunting.  I realized how blessed I am that my ex is ok because I saw how hard it is for my mom to not see her husband again.  I want my ex to be happy.  I also am pulling for him to find his happiness since it wasn't with me. 
Now here I am, 5 years later, trying to make sure my mom doesn't feel lonely, seeing my friends settle down with weddings, children, and moving in together scenarios, and me with my blog.  I remember jotting down the crazy things going on in my life and thinking, how did I end up HERE?  I think for the most part, we've all figured out that life isn't necessarily the way we thought it would be.  But for me, the only choice I have is to keep going.  Change is inevitable.  Whether you like it or not, it happens, and we have to adapt.  I know it's hard when you want things to be "easier" on you, but let's fact it.  Life isn't easy, but it can be beautiful.  Trust me.
It's been a little over 3 weeks since New Year's Eve.  I hope everyone out there are on track with their resolutions!!  The days leading up to New Year's was a little scattered.  First up, I started to feel yucky.  My throat was feeling funny.  I was tired.  And the text messages started to come in.  What were my plans?  Where was I going?  My first thought was home to take care of this sore throat.  The last thing I wanted to do was get sick on New Year's Eve.  I knew for a fact I did not want to be out somewhere crazy because of the last couple of years' craziness.  I wanted to feel safe and sound and with the company of friends.  My girlfriend who had her baby back in July was hosting a gathering at her place in the suburbs.  I agreed to spend it over there.
I ended up dressing up although most were dressed down.  lol.  I guess I should have asked first what was going on.  We watched the countdown live on tv, played games such as Family Feud, and joked around the rest of the night.  I felt content that I made the right choice by celebrating low key, but it was there I also had an idea for a New Year's resolution.  Now it's time to work for it! 
Our friends are now having families!  It's crazy!!

Mother and son and me

Good times with the girls! 

Group shot!

Thursday, January 21, 2016

Ugly Christmas Sweater Fiesta!

Today's Throwback Thursday takes us back to my friend's annual Ugly Christmas Sweater Party.  She moved to California last Spring and was visiting Chicago for the holidays.  In the past she's been known to throw some pretty awesome house parties.  We all missed her dearly when she left, so it was a nice surprise she managed to pull this together at the last minute.  Since Saturday fell after Christmas, she chose to host it then.  Luckily, I was shopping around for some after Christmas sales goodies when I found this sweater from h&m.  Not bad for $10.  I found some cute things to add to next year's Christmas decorations.  But for now, I was done for Christmas.  No more holiday décor shopping for me.  I figured every year they showcase different things to decorate.  Building up a Christmas collection DOES take time. 
It was nice seeing my friends at the party.  Not all of them made it out, but we had a blast regardless.  I definitely think getting together with friends for laughs is the best form of therapy! 


Posing in front of the tree...


Good times catching up...


Selfie time!

My H&M sweater up close.  I can't wait to wear it again next year!




My copper reindeer from Target.  Reduced half price.  Love her fur shrug!  lol

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Time to mentally recharge!

Well my worst case scenario happened last night.  Nothing dramatic, I swear.  But to me, an awkward situation nonetheless.  As a proud introvert, I sometimes feel I have to pump myself up in these social outings.  I know that may throw some people off considering how many times I go out, but for me, I have to prepare myself mentally whenever I get invited to things.  The obvious reasoning is that I am painfully shy.  It takes a while for me to come out of my shell.  Sometimes that can portray me in a different light.  I usually get people who ask me if everything is ok.  I can't help it.  I've always been this way.
I was worse when I was younger.  In my 20s I started working in retail because I always loved fashion.  One of my duties was to be a greeter to everyone that walked in the store.  To me it was no different than to ask me to perform open heart surgery.  I absolutely hated it.  My boyfriend at the time thought it was the easiest job in the world.  "You get paid to say hi", but he didn't understand where I was coming from.  When I look back on it, I realized it was a turning point for me.  Whether I liked it or not, it was part of my job and I had to do it.  One time a manager told me to, "Pretend you're the happiest girl in the world!!"  I thought it was odd but then it hit me.  Shy people don't necessarily look very happy. 
I grew some confidence in myself after working in the retail industry.  I did it for 10 years and I still think about going back.  What I learned too, is that women really do beat themselves up too much.  I had to help women find something fabulous to wear so they can feel fabulous.  Which leads me back to the "fake-it-till-you-make-it" mantra.
Now that I know ahead of time on what to expect, I can mentally prepare myself to be "ok".  I will let you know how I will train myself till then but for now, back to December events!
After we unwrapped our gifts on Christmas Eve, the next day my dad wanted me and my brothers to stop by for Christmas Day dinner.  MORE FOOD GALORE!!  His wife made arroz con gandules, a Puetro Rican dish that is usually served during special occasions.  It was perfect for a cold winter night.  Me and my brothers had a good time catching up with my Dad since we haven't spent too much time with him.  My dad works 2 jobs and he is 70 years old!  He has always been a workaholic so it's hard to find time with him and his busy schedule.  It was nice knowing he had the day off for a change.  My dad could ramble on for hours, especially after he had a couple of Modelos.


The table is all set for an Christmas Day dinner!

My Dad is FINALLY smiling!

My Dad, his wife and my bros!

Arroz con gandules!!

My Dad smacking away!
Playing around at home.  I bought this cable sweater from Banana Republic!


Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Back to work!

Just finished having a three day weekend due to Martin Luther King Jr. holiday.  I think it's kind of sad how the state of this country feels towards equality today.  Considering everything this man did in his power to bring awareness towards love and peace, we should be passed this by now.  Some things stayed the same.  Some things changed.  But is this change enough?  I feel the growing hatred among my friends and colleagues towards politics.  The differences in our neighboring states are astronomical.  I live in the Midwest, but views within our nation is drastically different in the southern part, west coast and east coast.  If we eliminate the views of our largest cities, we would have the rest of the states who despite not having such a large population, have a completely conservative view on how our country should be operating.  Which way is better?  When do we stop giving out excuses for our actions?  When do we step up to own up to our responsibilities as an American citizen?  I try my best to follow the law, to live within my means, to pay off my debt, and to live accordingly to my values.  But there is injustice around me, and when you get older, you assume, that's just the way that it is.  Pretty sad.
I will try my best to do what's right as a citizen, vote when needed, help out in my community.  We have the right to get worked up over issues that have been spanning over the course of 60 years.  We have the right to want things different than they are now.  We are the only country in the world that is made up of entirely different people and cultures from all over the world.  Let's embrace our country and continue to accept the changes that are happening everyday.  Let's work on accepting our differences and to learn from one another.  Let's be better people and remember that love and peace is what Martin Luther King Jr. fought for before he was assassinated. 
Over the weekend I put away my Christmas decorations for good.  My apartment looks so empty now.  I got use to my colorful, cheerful décor.  My apartment looks kind of boring now.  Oh well.  I did manage to go out on Friday for a birthday party, but the rest of the weekend I stayed in.  It was too cold to do anything.  I lit some candles, played my music loud, and did some exercises in my Italian language book.  I was ok to be home. 
Back to December events!  I think I'll be able to catch up soon since I've been laying low this month due to the weather.  I left off having my holiday party at the Four Seasons.  I stayed in the rest of that weekend and low and behold, Christmas Eve crept up out of no where.  I will say that our holiday party DID come late this year, so that made this month seem as if there was always something going on every weekend.  That could make an introvert get pretty exhausted.  My aunt was hosting again this year, so we made our way there.  She managed to take a mini vacation with her oldest daughter to New York and due to the weather conditions, came in on a much later flight and landed at 4pm that day.  She was one of the lucky ones.  Lots of people were stranded for days out in the East Coast.  I'm glad they made it home safely.  I loved the fact that the rest of the family pulled together to get dinner ready.  I knew that this holiday might make my mom emotional, but she was holding up fine.  Besides, Christmas is really for the kids.  Although my little cousins aren't so little anymore, the youngest one is 10 years old, so it was important that we made everything fun for him.  I got a chance to use my new selfie stick I received as a gift from work.  I loved it!  My family is small but it's all I have.  I love them dearly... 
Selfie stick time with my younger brothers...

Showing the rest of the family how the selfie stick works.  lol

I can't wait to use this thing for my next vacation!!

My little cousin getting excited for Christmas Eve dinner...

Christmas cookies!!

My aunt hosted dinner after arriving from New York earlier that day!  How she managed to pull this off is pretty amazing!

The men in my life!  My 2 younger brothers and my uncle and my little cousin...

My mom's side of the family.  Her brother and 2 younger sisters.  Like me, we are the oldest of our siblings...

Time for some pics in front of the tree!

My cousins!

Good times!

I wore a full length sweater duster with my skinny jeans and ankle boots. 

Friday, January 15, 2016

Overdue Debt PAID OFF!!

I finally did it!!  I paid off a huge debt that's been a thorn to my side today!!  I'm so relieved this day has finally arrived for me.  Once I noticed my low balance I knew I had to finish it off.  It became so customary for me to pay it every month I almost forgot it was going to end eventually.  I cannot express how important it was for me to do this on my own.  It was my responsibility after all, but I think sometimes people get the wrong idea on how to handle their debt.  It's time to own up to your mistakes and handle them head on.  If not, you'll never understand how you got there in the first place.

Back to December events!  The infamous holiday party arrived the following Friday.  Everyone at work were pretty excited.  I wore a sweater dress I won off ebay months ago.  I knew I could put it to use one day.  It's hard to dress for these things because it IS a work event after all, but it would be nice to wear something cute other than business casual.  Over the years I have worn a sweater and pencil skirt combo, as well as day dresses.  Since the holidays bring all types of social events to my calendar, I HATE shopping for myself because of the abundance amount of people in the stores.  That's why I'm an avid online shopper.  It's more practical to me because of the range of options available, not to mention, I can go by my price range.  Have to watch that budget!
This year our holiday party was being held at the Four Seasons hotel.  We usually have a trolley service take us to our events, and I love it!  Trolleys are so much fun!  Once we got there we made our way to our sectioned off area.  I enjoyed the buffet selections they prepared for us.  Sorry, but some places have to step up their game.  The menu included an Asian cuisine complete with pot stickers and eggrolls, to the usual mini sliders (they include mini hot dogs, too!), as well as healthier options such as sautéed jumbo shrimp and veggies.  Me and my co-worker friends sipped Prosecco and danced the night away to our very own dj.  We usually have a live band but this dj played a good range of music everyone enjoyed, plus he took requests!!  lol.  We had our reserved area until 9pm and as usual, wanted to take the party elsewhere.  We ended up at The Blue Frog for some karaoke.  We sang some songs and called it a night.  Luckily I went home afterwards because I noticed it was barely 11pm.  Still pretty early in my book considering it was a Friday night, but I was beat!   

LOVE ME A TROLLEY RIDE!
 
I love her navy lace shirtdress!

A bright red sweater for the holidays is always a hit!

They donned their Christmas sweaters to the party!