Heartbreak at Hubbard

I’m still trying to catch up on August events!  I finally decided that I will also visit Paris when I’m in Europe next week.  It’s been difficult these past few days trying to coordinate something with my friend who moved to Italy.  Unfortunately, I decided in the end that I will not be seeing her this time around.  I didn’t have much to work with and time was working against us.  I will be taking the Eurostar to Paris so I’m excited I won’t be hopping from plane to plane like I’ve done in the past.  I’ve been having trouble with my nerves again, and haven’t been able to hold anything in my stomach.  I hate myself whenever I go through this.  I can’t believe I still have trouble THINKING about getting on a plane.  Even the sound of a plane flying by creeps me out.  Maybe I should work at an airport part-time so I can get use to all of the noise and commotion?  I don’t know anymore…

Well back to part 2 of our friends visiting from North Carolina.  It turns out it birthday boy number 2 wanted to celebrate as well, and his dinner was going to be held at Mercadito.  I woke up not feeling so great that Saturday, and started to do my chores around my apartment.  I got a call on the phone that changed my mood completely.  Even as I’m writing this, I’m tearing up.  It’s nothing bad.  No one died, has cancer, etc.  Just one of those calls that makes you realize how much time has passed since my breakup.

I couldn’t stop crying afterwards, and my usual Saturday routine would be to hang out at my apartment so I could unwind from my job.  Not this Saturday.  I knew I was going to drive myself crazy with my thoughts, so I got dressed and ran out of the house.  The air and water show was happening that day, but I wanted to see what my friends from out of town were doing.  Unfortunately I was on the phone for over 2 hours that I missed the show.  By the time I was getting downtown, my friends told me they were heading back to the hotel.  

I mostly walked around.  I went to my favorite beach on Ohio and just sat and watched people.  There were a lot of boats on the lake.  It dawned on me how much I couldn’t wait to leave and see new faces.  I’ve been feeling this way ever since.

I did some window shopping and headed home to rest.  I was not in the mood to go out at all but my friends insisted.  I let my girlfriend know ahead of time what was going on in case people noticed the change in me.  The night before I was happy to be out but now I was a complete mess.  I was worried I would start crying out of the blue, but my girlfriend understood and told me she would keep me occupied. 

I got to dinner pretty late.  Everyone was finishing up.  They decided to stay a bit longer at Mercadito to have some cocktails.  I haven’t been there in a while so it was nice to see the hustle and bustle of a Saturday night.  In the end we decided to go to Hubbard Inn to continue the party.  I started to feel better there.  Our birthday party crew got bigger with more people arriving to join in on the fun.

We went across the street to Disco (again) and danced around.  My feet were killing me at this point, but I tried to stick it out as long as I could.  I went home.

What I learned is sometimes you need to be “distracted” in order not to be consumed with your own thoughts.  Whoever said you are your own worst enemy was not lying…    

When friends unite!

Today it's suppose to be warming up, with the weekend possibly reaching to the upper 60s.  A sharp contrast from last week's frigid weather.  I DID wear my trench for the first time, so maybe they're on to something.  Sorry, it's my nature to assume winter isn't quite over yet.  Considering I had plans last weekend I was out there in the cold.  I faced the challenge to get out of the house altogether.  I almost talked myself out of seeing Bob Sinclar.  For the birthday party at La Scarola I was surprised most of us showed up considering the snow and traffic were against us.  To top it off, another friend of ours was in town and wanted to get everyone together.  That might be challenging.  I told myself I would do it, but knew deep down the others weren't going to make it.  I had no reason not to be there, but it would have nice to see more faces.  He seem disappointed at first but in the end, we had a good time.  Regardless, our group was going to make the best of our Saturday night.  We started out at Hubbard Inn and caught up with one another.  We got stuck on deciding what to do next.  We hopped over to Graffiti Lounge before they closed their doors, and again, were stuck deciding where to go.  Then it started to rain.  And not just any rain.  Rain-snow as they call it.  I was done.  I wanted to make it to church and workout the next day, so I knew my time was up.  The weather is always a factor when it comes down to Chicago. 

LOVE playing with filters!  I'm enjoying my new phone. 

Good times with this crew...

I'm glad he's settling well in California...

TROUBLE

I like the peeking-bra look. 

Throwback Thursday to my BIRTHDAY!!!

One of the things that bother me about my birthday (besides getting older) is the fact that it falls in June.  Although I DO love the summer, it is a gentle reminder that half the year has gone by.  Up to this point in 2015, my mom was taking care of her sick husband, who eventually passes away, resulting in her depression.  Yeah, so far I wasn't enjoying this year.  I was trying my hardest to get out of this funk.  My mom went into therapy with the suggestion of her doctor, but soon quit after a few weeks.  I wasn't expecting her to quit so soon.  I really wanted her to talk to someone about her emotions, mostly because I was feeling depressed myself.  I couldn't help her feel better.  I was failing.  I was not good at this.
It was a tough situation to be in because I saw no way out.  All I could do was try to visit my mom once a week, as well as call her every night to make sure she's ok.  I felt my brothers weren't doing enough to help me deal with her.  I felt I was taking it all in more than them, and it was making me upset.  I needed some time for myself. 
I joined my Firm's softball team.  I needed to do something to keep my mind busy and not have to worry so much.  They've been asking me for years to join, mostly because they need players badly.  I'm terrible when it comes to sports, but I agreed to do it. 
I learned a lot about sportsmanship.  I also learned I should have been doing this a long time ago.  When you're in a team, you NEED TO WORK TOGETHER, and a lot of people have a hard time doing this.  They don't "play nice".  I loved our pep talks before each game, as well as our talks afterwards recapping the plays.  We supported one another, and it's something I needed at the time.
I am doing the best that I can, given the situation at hand.  I tried my hardest not to let my teammates down.  And if we lose, we got another shot at it next time.  Plain and simple.  It reflected what I was feeling with my mom, and it made me feel better.  Not to mention, swinging a bat whenever you are mad at the world DID was pretty therapeutic.  There's no doubt about that. 
So once my birthday came knocking on my door, my friends wanted to do something special for me.  I just wanted to hangout with them and catch up, but they insisted on taking me out to dinner.  We went to Sunda and had sushi and then afterwards, went all over the place.  lol.  We stopped by Hubbard Inn, then finished off at Room 7 for some non-stop dancing.  I loved my birthday!  I forgot all my troubles and just focused on me for one night.  It was perfect.  I don't think my friends understand how much it meant to me.  Especially now with our busy schedules, it's getting harder and harder for us to get together.  The one thing that does matter is that we check up on one another from time to time.  If you wonder how someone's doing, give them a call or a friendly text!  You never know if they need a little pick me up.   

Wearing my birthday-gift-to-myself

Good times at Sunda!

Hubbard Inn for some champagne!

The next day we headed down to the Taste of Randolph fest!

Goofing around while waiting for the rain to stop...

Found a birthday party to crash ...

Another birthday wish...

LOVED my flowers and balloon!

A long summer's day...

TGIF peeps!  I don't know about you, but this week in particular felt super long.  To make matters worse, it's getting dark pretty early.  Yet another reminder that fall is officially here.  Luckily the weather has been sweet so far, so it hasn't hit me yet that it's time to dust off the sweaters.  I'm hoping we'll have a warm Halloween for a change.  Last year the weather was cold and rainy!  YIKES!
Back in June, one of the most anticipated neighborhood festivals fell on a warm Saturday.  The Old Town Art Fest started off cloudy with the chance of showers, and if you know Chicago weather, it usually means storms.  Luckily it seemed the clouds were passing, (as so you thought).  I made my way down to join my friends for some afternoon action.  Artists showcase their work in a trendy locale ready for anyone whose interested in finding unique pieces.  There's even live music for entertainment.  I wore a white linen button down and my rag & bone jeggings with flat sandals.  Since I'm transitioning to summer weather, wearing breathable fabrics is a must.  Me and my friends had a good time before we all headed to other places we needed to be.  I had to head out to a family bbq while my other friends had a graduation dinner to attend.  We all agreed to meet up later on.
I hurried to my uncle's place to for the bbq.  A family friend had hired a Brazilian band for some music, but guess what came creeping up on us??  That's right, a storm.  It started to get very dark.  I think we were all hoping they were some passing clouds, but no such luck.  It started to pour on us.  We all scrambled to move the food inside and the poor band quickly covered up their equipment.  My uncle had a tarp so he grabbed a couple of guys to help him put it up.  I guess he could have done this beforehand, but these rain clouds came out of nowhere!  Once he got the tarp on, the party continued.  We danced the night away until the storm passed us by.  I loved the fact that we made the most of the night, despite our weather malfunction.  What else can you do?
We left around 11pm, where I quickly went home and changed to go back out.  Looks like the graduation party was heading out on the town and I wanted to catch up to them.  We met at Hubbard Inn for some drinks and then decided to go to another spot when we got a rude awakening.  Yup, you guessed it.  It was storming again.  We took refuge at Epic restaurant next door and stayed there the whole night.  The rain would not go away this time.  It did not stop raining hard til the next day.  I was pretty much done with the weather and headed home while my friends cabbed it to another spot.  They were determined to have some fun.  I on the other hand knew better.  No matter where they ended up, the weather was going to put a damper on attendance.  I knew I wasn't going to miss much.  lol.  Lesson learned from all the years I've lived here.  Sometimes it's better to quit while you're ahead...

Old Town Art Fest fun!

Look the sun's out!

Family bbq fun

Enjoying the music despite the weather..

My mom is still a little quiet around the family.  I think she's really missing her husband here.

Later on at Hubbard Inn for the graduation party.  We had a blast as usual...

Cinco de Mayo bar crawl!!!

This definitely was one of my highlights so far this year.  It was completely unexpected and in the end, I had a blast with new people checking out new places.  My friend needed a favor to help volunteer a bar crawl in River North.  I had no plans so off I went.  Luckily the weather warmed up pretty quickly now that we entered May.  But Chicago was busy that day.  The NFL draft was being held in downtown, the Kentucky Derby and the Pacquio vs Mayweather boxing match was being televised, along with our Cinco de Mayo bar crawl.  There was traffic everywhere!  We made our way down to meet the people we were working with.  Everyone had a pretty good vibe we were going to have a successful event.  I've never done this type of thing, so I was excited to help in anyway I could.  We were stationed at Hubbard Inn to check the patrons in. 
First of all, I had no idea what goes on organizing an event like this!  It was an eye-opening experience for me, because I love to go out and have fun.  But there's a lot of hard work behind the scenes.  This is a business based off  making sure everyone is enjoying themselves.  I loved meeting the people who participated in the crawl.  A lot of them where out-of-towners who were visiting Chicago for the first time.  For the most part, my friend and I gave out drink tickets and checked off names; pretty simple stuff.  Yet the smiles we encountered made this worthwhile experience for me.  What a great Saturday I had! 

Hubbard Inn's complimentary tequila sunrise cocktail (with drink ticket).

They even had a mariachi band!

Next stop on the crawl, Municipal Bar!

Shay had a Kentucky Derby party!

Last spot, Epic's rooftop!

Good times with the bar crawl crew!