Women's Day March

After resting on MLK it was back to work.  We are still trying to adjust to the new changes and have been busy ever since.  The news media were covering the transition of the Obama administration to the president-elect Trump nonstop.  It was getting overwhelming.  I did not watch the inauguration that Friday.  I wanted to ignore everything that was happening.  My friend asked me Thursday night if I wanted to go with her and her friends to the Women’s March downtown on Saturday.  I declined.  I really wanted to sleep in late.

But after seeing the riots break out on the news after the inauguration, I felt completely helpless.  People were frustrated and I knew there must be another way to voice our opinions.  I called up my friend and told her I would go with them.

My mom was upset with me.  For some reason, she was not aware of what the march was really about.  She felt I might get into some type of trouble.  The news were covering the riots and it made her nervous.  She even hung up on me.  I was hurt, mostly because she never gave me the chance to explain myself.  Like I said, we have not always had the best relationship and this brought back memories of our difficult times together.  I had to let it go.

The next day I met up with my friend at the Blue line stop at Logan.  There were floods of people jumping on the trains.  I was moved.  It was comforting to know that people were coming together peacefully to march for women’s rights.  We got off at Jackson and walked over with the rest of our group down to Grant Park.  I felt empowered to be around so many parents with their little girls displaying their banners and waving them freely.  I WISHED my mom was with me!  Whether these little girls knew it or not, they were learning to speak up when it came to injustice.  What a wonderful lesson to learn! 

I will never forget this day.  It was a first for me, but it was something I felt I had to do to.  Feeling helpless dragged me down here, but it left me feeling hopeful.  We will be heard, whether you like it or not.  Freedom of speech at its finest!

Longest Month of the Year

I'm so happy January is over.  Not only does it feel like the longest month of the year, but the lack of sunlight makes it more depressing.  Now that we're in February, it's giving me a chance to reflect on some things I never knew was going on.
The hoopla of the holidays sometimes gets the best of us.  I was feeling drained at one point attending too many things at the same time.  Once Miami came out of nowhere, I was certain things were going to look up this year.  I felt happy and confident of the year ahead of us.
Now it's a different story. 
The first full week in January I was still recovering from my weekend getaway.  I started work that Tuesday, but by the time I reached the weekend, I just wanted to relax.  I caught up with a friend over sushi and told him about my trip.  It was nice recapping my moments with someone.
That 1st Sunday I was ready to start my week off at church.  Another friend of mine wanted to hear the details of my trip and we met up afterwards for brunch.  We talked about the transitions both our moms are facing being a widow.  My mom lost her husband almost 2 years ago, and his mom lost her husband last year.  It was interesting discussing their challenges.
Then it was back to work.  I felt confident starting the new week fully rested since I kept it low key over the weekend.  I didn't really notice anything different at work.  But then something didn't feel right.  Right before I left that day, I had an uneasy feeling.
The following day, there were major layoffs at my firm.  I had to excuse myself to go to the restroom to cry in the stalls.  I saw people who were my friends get escorted out.  Some employees have worked together for over 20 years.  It was one of the hardest days I had to deal with in a very long time.

For the rest of the week I cried every morning.  I couldn't wait until Friday.  I was going to have dinner with my family to celebrate my step brother's birthday.  I just wanted to be with my family.

By request he wanted to have dinner at Cortland’s Garage in the Bucktown neighborhood.  I was skeptical because my mother wanted to go and I think there was some confusion at first.  My older brother was under the impression we were going to a restaurant, but I knew better.  I was worried that if it was indeed a pub, it might be too noisy for my mom.  She has been recently diagnosed with having tinnitus and has a hard time hearing in loud environments.  Although she is losing her hearing, there is a constant buzzing in her eyes which amplifies when there is loud noise involved and it makes my mother very uncomfortable until the point it becomes painful for her.  I prayed I was wrong but like I said, I knew better.

We walked into the pub and they were playing rock music on their speaker system.  She insisted she was fine but I feel she was just saying that so we could continue along with the party.  Next time I warned my brothers that we have to be more considerate.  

Our step brother was glad we showed up, and then his family came once we were seated.  We had a good group going and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves.  Then my mother started to express her feelings over the holidays.  How hard this year felt as oppose to last year.  How much she misses her husband.  I never realized how depressed she had been feeling up to this point.  She mentioned how this was the first year she didn’t put up a Christmas tree because of how difficult it’s been without him.  I felt defeated.

I knew right then and there, that there was nothing I could do to make her feel better.  All she wants is for her husband to be here and that is impossible.  The times I tried to take her out of the house and do different things did not make those feelings go away.  I sat speechless.

In the end, we loved our burgers and our step brother seemed happy we were celebrating with him.  For that night, that is what mattered the most.  As for the rest of the weekend, I stayed low key again.  I was pretty worn out with everything that was happening at work and with my mom.  Martin Luther King weekend was a moment for me to try to unwind.  And then Trump took office… 

I'm In MIAMI b*tch! Part 2

My friend jumped out of bed after 10am.  I was still out of it, but she told me the 3rd guy was going to come pick us up at 12pm.  I was not aware what was going on and having a few hours of sleep was not helping.  He had a friend that was staying with him at his place and was going to drive her to South Beach.  We were going to tag along.  My girl also wanted to play some volleyball while we were out in Miami, so she got her ball ready.  Our friend was pretty tired and opted not to go to the beach with us.  Oh well.  We tired.  We threw on our bikinis and threw on our swim cover ups and off we went!
Our new friend, 3rd guy was right on time.  We met his friend that was staying at his place.  She had celebrated the new year at a private party and was showing us pictures.  It was held at a mansion and looked pretty spectacular.  Since we were getting acquainted with one another I had a good feeling about our group.  So far, Miami was treating us nicely. 
The beach was wonderful considering it was January 1st.  It hit me that we escaped from the cold in Chicago and this was pretty surreal.  The temperature hit 80 degrees but again, the sun wasn't hitting hard.  Another cloudy day but no overcast.  We drove around in circles looking for parking but after 20 minutes our new friend suggested we wait for him at Pura Vida juice bar.  By this time we were getting dizzy since we left without having breakfast and I needed coffee terribly.  This place was packed already, so waiting in line there took just as long.  By the time our new friend joined us, we got a chance to place our orders.  I ordered a PB Energy acai bowl and it was delish!  It came with raw organic Brazilian acai blended with bananas and peanut butter and topped with strawberries, granola, berries and almonds.  I felt good having something so filling yet healthy.  

We had our breakfast outside and enjoyed our time there.  By now it was getting close to 2pm and we still hadn't hit the beach.  We were drained from the night before and couldn't wait to lay out on the sand.  We walked over and found a good spot, but our new friend wanted to knock out for a bit.  My friend got the itch to find a volleyball court, so we parted ways and I followed her.  We found the courts by the infamous Ocean Drive, right by where the hotel strips are at.  We found an empty net and my friend went up to a girl sitting on the beach watching the others play.  She asked if she wanted to play with her and she jumped at the chance.  It turns out she wanted to play too, but had no one to play with.  

Now with their new team they found 2 other to play against.  I laid out and watched their stuff for about an hour when I started to get fussy.  I wanted to walk around.  The last time I was in  Miami was almost 10 years ago and I wanted to see what changed.  I told my friends I would be back and I took my time looking around.  Miami definitely has a certain look to it, but now that I'm older, I had to pass up on some of the styles.  I miss being young.

South Beach has a lot of traffic too.  There are people cruising up and down Collins Avenue.  I made my way back to my friends where they were finishing up their last game.  This time, 3rd guy had met up with them, but his friend was missing in action.  She had gotten up to walk around herself.  Now it was a matter of trying to find her. 
We got back to his car, but apparently her phone had died at some point.  Now WE were cruising up and down Washington avenue, but I loved being on the strip.  Since it was now getting close to rush hour, more people were flooding the streets and the traffic was getting heavier.  We found her by Lincoln Avenue and we hopped back on the expy to head back to East Miami.  The traffic was awful.  It took us over 30 minutes to get back, and my friend knocked out on the drive there.  She had played for 2 hours straight, but since she never fully rested, couldn't help herself but fall asleep to the bumper to bumper traffic. 
We got back to East Miami and knew we had to eat something before we headed out.  There was a party going on at the The Deck starting at 8pm and we were already running behind.  We stopped by a plaza and had some grub before we got back and showered up.  Our friend was awake and we asked him if he was going to come with us.  Earlier he mentioned wanting to sleep because he wasn't feeling well from the night before.  He was interested in The Deck and got ready quickly.  We weren't ready yet and he told us to meet him at the Blue Martini down the street.  He was in the mood to get a head start. 
We walked over to the Blue Martini and knew right away we were going to have another confrontation with our friend.  He was just getting too comfortable at the bar again.  It took us a while to have him close out his tab, but we made some new friends at the process.  Now that our group got a little bigger, we were excited about starting our evening.  We took a uber and finally got to the The Deck after 10:30pm.  Later than expected, but thankfully we made it.  The place was awesome!  Everyone was feeling the live music along with a dj on stage.  People were dancing everywhere.  We found our friends from earlier, and then our new volleyball friends made it in as well.  I loved how everyone was coming together to have a fun night.  We even ran into Tyson Beckford mingling in the crowd.  It was such a Miami moment.  lol.

Around midnight the crowd started to dwindle down.  We decided to check out the Wall at the W hotel and hopped on ubers to get there.  We got there when it was going on and ended up staying the rest of the night.  I had a blast dancing the night away.  I loved our group.  Good times for sure.

Heading back we realized we still had to purchase our flights back home.  Because of our crazy night, we woke around 12pm and for the next 2 hours were searching frantically for flights.  It was such a frustrating experience but we found one leaving at 3pm and left for the airport shortly.  I felt bad not being able to say bye to everyone but I did manage to send out a text.  I wish we could have stayed longer but then, again, what if we never leave??  lol

I'm In MIAMI b*tch!

After going back and forth with my friend, I was slowly realizing we might jump on a plane in a few hours.  I started to get anxious.  NOT GOOD.  All of the sudden, I had so much to do in such a short amount of time.  As soon as I received the confirmation text, I knew we were set to go.  She had a lot to do as well and we ended our conversation.  She will be at my place at 4:15am.  HOLY MOLY!  What do I pack?  I didn't want to check in any bags so I brought out my weekend bag.  I figured I'll pack lightly since we'll be staying with a friend of hers.  There was talk that others might be staying at his apartment, too, so I didn't want to have too much stuff with me.
I started to clean up frantically.  Over the years I would have my New Year's Eve ritual of having a clean apartment, a stocked fridge, a packed suitcase by the door, as well as having my red underwear on underneath my clothes.  I quickly grabbed my red undies so I wouldn't forget.  I threw in a wrap dress I won on ebay months ago and checked the weather.  It was barely 80 degrees, but I forgot how that felt like.  lol.  I packed in a pair of skinny black pants and a top if we went out the next day.  I threw in two bikinis and my swim coverup and had some nude flip flops that I would use as my walking sandals.  I decided to wear some blue skinny jeans on the plane, so I packed 2 casual tops in case we walked around.  I also packed my gym clothes that I was going to use as my pajamas.  Again, not sure how the living situation was going to be for the next two days, so I played it safe by sleeping in my gym clothes.  lol
I finished cleaning up my apartment and then took a quick body shower and followed up with a self mani and pedi.  I was too excited to go to sleep so I finished reading the end of my book and felt good about it.  I knew it would be impossible to read out there and wanted to end that chapter of 2016.
I probably knocked out around 2:30am only to wake up to my alarm going off an hour later.  I knew I wanted to sleep on the plane anyway so I didn't have a problem with this at all.  I texted my friend to see if she was awake and jumped in the shower again to wash my hair.  Everything was happening so fast.  By the time I was getting dressed, she texted me that she was going to be at my place in 15 minutes.  YIKES!
I had everything ready when she called me to let me know that she was downstairs.  I rushed to meet her with my bags, but she had a present for me for Christmas.  I ran back up to my place to drop the gift off and grabbed hers.  She ordered the lyft and the next thing you know, he was waiting for us.  My anxiety was getting the best of me.  I just wanted to be on the plane so I could knock out and not feel this way.  I could tell my friend was super excited but I warned her that I wasn't feeling so great.  I needed her to understand how terrified I was getting on the plane. She could tell by my expression how worried I was and seemed to understand. 

Hiding behind sunglasses.  She was pretty excited.  I wanted to sleep it off.

Everything at the airport was a blur.  I remembered feeling a bit overwhelmed while we waited to board on.  I didn't know what I was getting myself into, but I just wanted us to be there already.  I did manage to knockout on the plane and woke up right before we landed.  I did it!  We're on ground and we're safe!
We waited a while before her friend arrived.  He was running behind schedule.  I was slowly feeling my normal self but my friend never slept on the flight.  She was still super excited we were in Miami for New Year's Eve.  I was out of it, but since I was nervous about keeping food down, skipped on eating and now I was starved.  Once he arrived, we agreed to go get breakfast.
We were in East Miami which was indeed, 20 minutes away from South Beach.  The last time I was in Miami was almost 10 years ago with my ex.  We had came down for the Winter Music Conference.  Those were some crazy times, but because I came at the last minute, I had no idea what was going down tonight.  It DID feel good to be away from Chicago.  A change of scenery works wonders.
We went to a sportsbar called Batch which was around the corner from his place.  I needed some coffee BAD but her friend had other things in mind!  lol.  It was way too early for me to drink but it dawned on me that our mini getaway was going to be insane!  We were in MIAMI!!

Breakfast at Batch.  I cleaned off my plate!

After a couple of hours at the bar, me and my friend realized that he was not going to move from his spot.  We wanted to walk around and find the nearby mall he mentioned earlier.  We took matters on our own hands and told him we would come back for him later.  He was enjoying his time at the bar and we didn't want to interrupt him.
The mall was semi outdoor so it was cool to walk around.  My friend desperately wanted to lay out.  She figured we could kill two birds with one stone and nap in the process.  We headed back to get our friend but he still wasn't ready to leave Batch.  We wasted some more time there before we finally dragged him back to his place to drop off our stuff.  He had a pool at his building and we wanted to lay out before the sun went away.  It was cloudy in Miami but luckily no overcast.  We changed into our bikinis and headed up.  It was relaxing laying out.  We took advantage of the time and dozed off. 

As you can tell, cloudy day but not even sun to get any color.  BOO!

We managed to get in 30 minutes of sleep, but whenever a big cloud would roll in, it covered the sun and we would get nippy.  We stayed out about an hour before realizing it was 5pm now.  He mentioned to us that he had some friends coming in around 6pm and we wanted to get a head start getting ready.  My friend wanted to get a professional mani and pedi and luckily there was a salon across the street from his apartment.  We walked back down to throw some clothes on, but our friend had never laid down to rest himself.  He was still drinking.  I was surprised he wasn't tired but he told us before we walked out that he was going to try to lay down a bit.  We knew we had a long night ahead of us.
A lot of my friends found out through social media that we were in Miami.  It was funny because my friends know how I am.  I am hardly the spontaneous type.  Not to mention, I didn't accept two invitations for other weekend getaways.  I had some explaining to do!  I texted back friends while my friend got her nails done.  The salon owner came out and gave customers a glass of champagne.  How sweet!
After about an hour at the salon we went back up to the apartment to check on our friend.  Just like we thought so, he was completely knocked out.  We took our time getting ready.  My friend noticed that his phone was buzzing off the hook.  He had his phone on silent but people were calling him like crazy.  My friend had a back up plan on meeting other Chicagoans that were in Miami if this wasn't going to pan out.  We were more worried about looking our best, so we continued getting ready. 
Of course, like clockwork, our friend woke up.  He knew his friends made it in and were waiting on him back at Batch.  They did not know where else to go.  He quickly got ready and we all walked over to find them.
Luckily his friends were in a good mood.  They had been waiting for over an hour but ate in the meantime.  We all introduced each other and didn't realize our friend had parked himself at the bar again.  Me and my girl looked at each other and realized we might have a situation in our hands.
We were waiting on a 3rd friend to come by.  We still had no clue were we were going to spend New Year's Eve at.  Once the 3rd guy arrived we started to brainstorm.  South Beach was out of the question.  Our new friends insisted it would be too hard to get in anywhere this late in the evening.  By now it was 10pm and we still had no idea where to go.
One of the guys closed out our friend's tab at the bar.  At least he was proactive!  lol.  We gathered around and by the 3rd guy's suggestion, settled on going to Sugar, a hotel rooftop nearby.  We took a walk over and got there in no time flat!
We made it inside and that's when we all started to get excited.  WE FOUND A PLACE AND WE HAD TIME TO SPARE BEFORE MIDNIGHT!  Once we got up to the rooftop, we ordered drinks right away.  I was feeling good and our new friends were fun!  Everything was perfect!  Me and my girl hugged and kissed each other at the stroke of midnight.  We made some amazing friends.  We stayed there past 2am when our crowd was dwindling down.  It was just me and my friend with the 2 guys waiting at Batch earlier.  Since they drove down here, they were going to stay with us at our friend's place.  We wanted to see what else was going on and they suggested a cigar lounge.  We took a cab over there and made our way in.  I was getting exhausted by now, but my girl was still going strong.  Around 3am I couldn't take it anymore.  My eyes were closing in on me and I had to go.  My friend stayed out longer.  I was impressed but as for me, it's lights out!   

On our way up to Sugar!  Cool elevator...

Our crazy friend!  I'm glad he woke up on time!  lol

3rd guy saved the day!  We loved this place!!

NYE was a blast with this hottie!

Won this BCBG dress off ebay and I think it worked great for this evening..

City view of East Miami...

At the cigar shop.

Mommy Dearest...

The craziest thing I did for 2016 was the way I ended it.  Looking back on it now, it was pretty irresponsible of me.  I am definitely paying the price for it, lol, but luckily I'll be back on track with my budgeting for this new year.  I had no plans for New Year's Eve and didn't feel the need to celebrate it either.  The aftermath of the holidays was almost over and I was slowly feeling back to my normal self.  I spent the whole day with my mom and was looking forward to watching a special on tv about Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher.  Both of them passed within a day of each other and it was all over the news.  What a tragic turn of events that shook the world.  I felt a sense of closeness with my mom after spending the day with her, but knew moments like this were bitter sweet for us.  There was a time when me and my mom did not speak.  It took a long time for us to get to where we are at.
I hurried home and was starting to watch the special that Friday night when my friend started to text me out the blue.  She wanted to know if I had to work that Monday January 2nd.  Since New Year's Day landed on Sunday this year, the holiday was being observed that following Monday.  I was indeed off and replied yes while I was washing up to get ready for bed.  The texts didn't stop.  "If I buy your plane ticket and cover hotel, wanna go someplace warm with me leaving tomorrow and returning the 2nd?".
"What the??"  This girl is really something.  She had just gotten back from Florida two weeks ago for her birthday.  I knew she was spontaneous but this is too much.  We went back and forth but I was dead set against it.  I confessed that I wish I was in a better place financially and that I could not have her pay for my plane ticket.  I wasn't putting much thought into until she told me how cheap the flights were.  Don't get me wrong.  Flying to Miami was low considering what time we had to head out in morning.  Since I'm not a travel junkie and have still yet to learn the process of finding good flights, my friend had been frantically looking for deals all day.  She travels all the time.  I was skeptical but it was starting to make me think.  What if we could pull this off?  She had a friend in Miami who lived 20 minutes away from South Beach and was insisting that we stay with him.  Things were starting to look more promising for me money wise.  I did not want my friend to pay my way down there but now I could manage the rest.  I was still hesitant until I realized I had just dropped off my mom 40 minutes ago!  If we booked this flight we had to head out in a couple of hours.  I called her up immediately. 
My other aunt was hosting a small party at her house for New Year's Eve and I had a feeling my mom was under the impression I was going.  Over the years I would have had other plans, but because this year I didn't follow through with anything, I told her I might stop by after all.  I was nervous she might think I was holding something back from her but I had to set the record straight.  I told her how my friend found a good deal on a flight flying into Miami but we had to leave in a few hours.  I also told her I was hesitant about it because I knew I hadn't budgeted for such a trip so soon.  I was rambling on and on until I realized how nervous I was getting.  My anxiety was starting to act up.
"Well, why don't you tell her next time?  That you cannot go right now and that next time you can travel with her?".  I stood silent.  I didn't realize my mom was under the impression that I was asking her advice, but in actuality I was just letting her know what was going through my mind.  I stood my ground and said, "Well actually mom, I WAS thinking about going."  Now she stood quiet, but I continued on that if I had the chance to go to Miami for New Year's Eve, I would take it.  It was just a matter of seeing if this would pan out.  "If we do book this, I would only be gone for 2 days and I don't see what the damage would be.  We would be staying with a friend and we should be ok.  But if you ask me where would I rather spend New Year's Eve at, of course I would answer anywhere but here!"  She seemed shocked and answered, "Oh ok."  I reassured her what I was planning but was doubtful since anything can happen once you try to purchase tickets.  You never know about last-minute-flights.  I told her I would let her know what we decided and we said goodnight to one another.  It was now 10pm...

Mother /Daughter Day

Since my mom retired in mid October, I told myself I wanted to do something with her OUTSIDE of the house at least once a month.  My mom has been in mourning since her husband passed away, and for the most part has continued working until her retirement.  She rarely steps out of the house unless it's for running her errands.  I felt it was important for her to continue to live her life during this transition which meant I needed her to look forward to something.  Sometimes her depression gets the best of her and she would cancel on me at the last minute due to bad weather conditions, feeling tired, or whatever excuse she would make up.  I knew on my end I didn't want to push her into doing something she wasn't ready to do.  I had a scheduled day off from work on the last Friday of December.  When I spoke to her the night before, I had suggested we do something concerning the holidays before all the festivities would be taken down.  I cannot go over her place too long due to her dog, so she has to work with me whether she likes it or not.  I wanted to checkout the Museum of Science and Industry to look at the Christmas trees around the world exhibit.  Automatically she brought up how cold it might be, and of course, I debated back that we are in winter after all and that's expected.  She didn't seem to budge so I dropped it.
In the morning I enjoyed watching the news and wanted to finish up my last book I was reading for the year, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"; a self-help book I got off of Amazon.  I figured it would be a great way to for me to prepare for 2017, and I was down to the last chapter.  Sure enough, around 11am she called me out the blue.  "You know, I took Lucky out for a walk and it didn't seem that cold out".  It looks like my mom wanted to step out after all.  Unfortunately we went back and forth on the phone, and concluded that heading to Hyde Park to the Museum of Science and Industry was not going to work for us.  We still had to get ready and meet up somewhere since we both don't have a car.  If we wanted to head there, we should have left much earlier.  I had a back up plan.  I told her we could head down to Millennium Park to watch the ice skating rink and she agreed. 
We got downtown around 2pm and made our way there.  But since we were passing State Street, we realized we did not get a chance to see the Christmas display at Macy's.  We walked around the building to see the window displays and took pictures.  We figured we could checkout what they had inside.  It was nice looking around with my mom.  She's worked in downtown all her life and loves the glitz and glamour of nice things.  Even though she couldn't afford such stuff, it never stopped her from appreciating the finer things in life.  We made our way to the Walnut room to checkout their tree, but the line was too long for us to be seated for lunch.  We kept on going.
We made it to Millennium Park and watched the people ice skate for some time.  My mom wasn't aware of the skating rink there, so that's why I took her so she could become familiar with it.  She was having a good time.  The line to have lunch at the Park Grill was short, so we decided to have lunch there. 
I realized we were doing good with time and thought maybe we could catch a movie.  During Christmas Eve, my mom had mentioned how she wanted to see Lion with Dev Patel.  I was surprised she even knew about such a film, but she claimed she saw something on tv about it.  My mom is not the artsy film type.  When her husband was alive, he was mostly into blockbuster movies and that's what they would see.  To have her tell me she wanted to see this type of movie surprised me.  But I wanted to make her happy, so I looked up the movie times and found one for 5:30pm at the AMC at Streeterville.  She seemed glad we were going.
Off we went to the show.  It was an amazing film, and it haunted me for days afterwards.  There is an Oscar buzz and I hope they get the nominations in.  Lion is based off a true story about a little boy that got lost from his older brother in India at a train station.  My mom claims when she was a little girl back in Guatemala, her and her younger brother would sometimes roam the streets at such a young age.  I often wonder how she randomly remember such times now that she's older.
I cried a lot during the movie and so did she.  I felt that it brought us closer.  At one point as we were having lunch, my mom said to me out of the blue "Thank you nena."  It was nice...

I can't believe Tom Brady is going to the Super Bowl again!

Pretty tree at the Walnut Room

Goofing off at Macy's

We got a chance to see people ice skate at Millennium Park...

I always order crab cakes whenever it's on a menu!

My wooden Santas are watching me.  lol

Wore an old winter white flannel blazer that helped keep me warm that day.  Perfect alternative to a thick sweater.

Holidays are OVER! part 5

Well today is the day I have been dreading for weeks.  We have a new president in office; one whom I did not vote for.  Over the weeks, I have witnessed his supporters come out of the wood works.  They voice their reasoning on why they chose to put him in office.  I have observed that they usually dislike him, or pick out ONE legitimate stance that they agreed upon.  And that's about it.  I am still pretty confused on how someone can vote like that, but there you have it.
During the holidays, I was aware that the upcoming year was going to have changes.  My mom had entered retirement.  My job had some talk going around.  And now we have a new presidency.  The future seemed unsure.  I tried to enjoy the moments I had with my family and friends but with the holiday burn out I was experiencing, the tension was back firing.  On Christmas Eve stress left me with tension on my shoulders.  I was pooped out.  I didn't realize that I was spreading myself thin.  On top of that, I had rejected two birthday parties and two weekend getaways during the holiday season.  There was simply no way I could do it all but I felt bad rejecting my friends.  I look back now and realize I made the right decision.  In the end, you HAVE to take care of yourself.  What good would it do to be a complete mess for your family and friends?
My dad was hosting a Christmas Day dinner for me and my brothers.  I knew I couldn't miss this.  This was a nice tradition that had started some years ago on the part of my dad.  If you remember, he was not a part of my life for some time, and we reconnected in my mid 20s. 
Some things had lingered from the night before at my aunt's that had me question my dad.  He wasn't around for part of our lives, but I knew he could give me some insight on my family.  During dinner I asked a lot of personal questions this time, mostly to mend the loops I've heard from my mom's side of the family.  I feel I received some clarity, although the next day I ended up telling my mom some of my conversation with my dad.  I guess I thought I could continue this conversation about my family, but instead it got her irritated.  I forgot how much my mom suffered without my dad being around for us, and those feelings were deeply rooted.  Here I was poking my head in someone's business that was not intended for me and my brothers to know.  But I still felt I had a right to ask.
I want to know why things were the way they were.  I want to know about relatives that I've shared brief encounters with.  I wanted to know how things came to light and how people handled the changes throughout their lives.  It was interesting to me, plus it made me learn about my mom and her family more.  Parents seem to think they can place certain information to you, and that they  would be our truths, when in actuality it's not.  It's biased.  It's one-sided.  It's half of the story.
For some years me and my mother had our issues and sometimes wouldn't speak to one another.  I wanted to know why we chose to deal things liked that.  Now that we have a reoccurring relationship, how can I preserve that?  How do I handle her anger and frustrations if she doesn't agree with me?  A daughter needs to know.
In the end, I am grateful I had the opportunity to talk to my dad about other issues besides Chicago politics and sports.  I think me and my brothers learned a lot from him that night and I choose not to feel bad about what I did.  The last thing I want my mom to think is that I'm siding with him when I'm just trying to learn about our family's history. 
What do you think?  Was I out of line?

Best x-mas gift I got this year! 

Me and my younger brother...

Me and my dad talking about family stuff.  I'm not sure if he has selective memory, but it was interesting hearing him out.

His wife made pozole for us.  Perfect for a wintery day!

The green sauce is always the spicier sauce!

The rest of my family at the dinner table.  We had a good time chatting away...